Lifetime of Simpsons

S01 E10 – Homer’s Night Out

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Sexism everybody! Y’know, this was really the first time I think I’ve ever really sat and watched these episodes as anything more than entertainment, and it’s kind of nuts to realize that this show was hitting some serious goddamn topics, right off the gate. Having a ten year old boy having to be taught that women aren’t objects, they’re people, that’s kind of a heavy topic.

This episode starts off with a great joke, that as a fat dude, I totally relate too. Having Homer say that he’s going to start exercising every day, and then immediately show that he’s full of shit and has given up…that hits close to home. It’s also a pretty big bummer realizing that for most of my life Homer was this crazy fat dude in my mind…then seeing that I weigh more than he does, by quite a bit. Yikes. Anyway, let’s get off that bummer, and get into the meat of the episode. We have the two main plot points set up pretty early, Homer is going to a bachelor party, and Bart is sending away for a spy camera from an ad on the back of a comic. I wish comics still had ads for crazy stuff like x-ray specs and spy cameras. Bart starts to go crazy as he waits for the camera to finally ship, something I did quite a bit back in those backwards days before Amazon Prime. I enjoy that Bart refers to the woman mailman as a “female man.” Nice wordplay Bart. So he gets a little tiny camera, and starts to right away piss off the family with his pictures.

The night of the bachelor party arrives, and it just happens that it’s being held at the same restaurant that Marge brings the kids. And I’ve got to say, that bachelor party seemed to suck. Just a weird room off a seafood restaurant where everyone’s smoking and drinking beer? Man, for mine we went to a hockey game and went to a bar that was also an arcade. Suck it, dude who works with Homer! But as Homer and his coworkers begin ogling the weird exotic dancer Princess Kashmir, Bart is out ordering a squid platter for dinner, and changing a sign to read “cold pet rat.” He leaves the table and ends up finding the stag party, and right as he opens the door, Homer happens to be dancing with the stripper, and Bart gets a picture of it.

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Bart then develops the picture with the help of Martin and a few other kids who are in a darkroom that apparently exists in their elementary school. I took photography all through highschool, and except for my senior year when they switched to digital cameras, it was all analogue, and man, I miss that. It was so fun taking pictures that you had no idea what they looked like, developing the film yourself, dealing with the enlargers, developing the photopaper, just really making the picture your own. I don’t take pictures as much now that I have a digital camera, it’s just not as fun. But I definitely don’t want to use a film camera now, because I wouldn’t get to use a dark room, and that’s like half the fun. Anyway, that was a tangent. The rest of the kids love the picture of Homer and the stripper, and it quickly spreads around the school, then the town, making Homer something of a local celebrity. I love that Homer thinks that everyone is insane when they begin to comment on the picture. But then Marge finds the picture and gets super pissed, kicking Homer out of the house. Which I think is a little weird, since last week she legit almost had an affair, all Homer did was dance with a stripper. Whatever.

So Homer goes to Moe’s, like usual, where there’s a sign that says “unescorted ladies drink free,” which is possibly the sketchiest thing I’ve ever heard. But Homer ends up staying with Barney in his incredibly gross apartment. I also love that when Homer comments to being able to see the house from there because of the porch light, Barney calls Marge to yell at her about wasting electricity. Homer’s new status as a Lothario spreads around the town, and Mr. Burns ends up asking him for advice for ladies, which Homer responds with my new favorite advice for wooing a woman: “Wine ’em, dine ’em, write ’em love poetry.” Great.

But Marge finally lets Homer come back, on the condition that he teaches Bart that treating women like objects isn’t acceptable. And they decide that the way to do that is find Princess Kashmir and teach Bart that she’s a real person, with her own thoughts and emotions and dreams. So Homer takes his ten year old son to every strip club in town! Homer and Bart go to some seriously sketchy places, where Homer is like a star from the picture, until they finally find the right cabaret that she’s working at. They go backstage, and talk with Princess Kashmir, who is seriously weirded out, but she gives him real answers, then, since it’s a comedy, Homer gets brought up in a giant bird cage (don’t ask) and falls out into the crowd during the burlesque show. The crowd then begins to hoot and holler, but Homer stops them and gives a pretty great speech about respecting women, complete with the amazing line “I would rather feel the breath of my wife on the back of my neck as I sleep rather than stuff dollar bills in a strangers g-string.” Ah, true love! The crowd starts to weep as Marge shows up and kisses Homer, leading Bart to close out the episode by saying “only sick people want to see my folks kiss.”

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This was a great episode. It was really funny, and dealt with a pretty serious topic in a really great way. Homer’s last speech is legit moving. Plus it drummed up those old photography memories for me which was fun. Homer and Marge are good parents guys.

Take Away: Women are people too, treat your wife right, and strip clubs are sketchy. Good job guys.

“Homer’s Night Out” was written by Rich Moore and directed by Jon Vitti

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